don’t squash my dreams…

Well, as you can see, I’ve decided to crawl out from the hole I’ve been living in. I go through these moments of living in MY LIFE, and not following the world on my computer, iPhone…just living, breathing world. Luckily, for you, I’ve decided to break the silence and say hello. And, you’re welcome!

This is going to sound selfish. I am sorry for that because I don’t want you to think that I am a rude jerk. This shutdown, which I seem to always type shitdown–a more appropriate term–is cramping not only the lives of some of my government friends, but it’s also stalling races in DC. (Wilson Bridge Half Marathon had to be postponed, Army Ten-Miler rerouted.) I hope all will be ironed out soon…but it won’t. And, I don’t talk politics or religion, in person, or “fake world,” as I like to call social media, but I just want to say, I don’t like this shutdown…not one bit.

And, now this is where I sound like, ME, ME, ME.

I was happily on my way to run club yesterday, when I made a horrible mistake…I checked Facebook. Horrible mistake. Horrible. This is what I read,

Dear Runners,

Since the government shutdown occurred, the Marine Corps Marathon continues its coordination with hopes of a conclusion in time to host the event without impact. Without a resolution to the government shutdown this week, the MCM as planned is in jeopardy of being cancelled.

While still considering and exploring all possible options, the MCM has targeted this Saturday, October 19 as the date to officially notify runners of the status of the event. It is sincerely the hope of everyone associated with the organization of this event that MCM participants can run as planned.

Then, I got in the car. There was only one thing to do to remain calm and “happy” for run club and that was to call my dad. One of the only people in my life who I can revert into an irrational 12-year-old without judgment. He assured me that things, as far as the race were concerned, would be okay. The Maniacal Marathon dream would come true, at this year’s MCM. He has faith. He is an optimist.

Me…not so much. I am not optimistic. Rumor has it there is a vote happening. Just a marathon’s distance down the “road.”

Even, at work, people are worried about my DREAM.

So, I am trying to be an optimist with my dad. But, right now, I would like to throw a tantrum that would impress a two-year-old. I would like to sulk like a teen filled with angst. I would like the lawmakers to make good decisions for our country. Not temporarily. For good. Or, at least, long-term. I would like the shitdown to end.

And, I would like to run Marine Corps Marathon. In the meantime, a colleague has offered to do research so that I have a backup marathon…just in case. I don’t want a backup plan. I want this plan. But, for now, I’ll remember that I’m a runner. I’m a marathoner. If I’m not a Marathon Maniac this time. I will one day.

I’m a not always a pessimist. Sometimes, I am a dreamer. And this Maniacal idea was just a little “dream” in March. Truth is, after this dream is fulfilled, I’ll have to start dreaming of another fun, new running goal.

I have to keep my colleagues amused.

look how happy i am when i run…

It’s off to Chattanooga this weekend. Luckily things seem a bit better there. No canceling races…that I know of…. I am happy to run out of this town. Taking this happy girl on the road.

Back to that hole.